Wow! I'm behind on this blogging thing. Life keeps happening!
Mr. Mayer, Aunt Betsy and I took Diva to see Cirque De Soleil Michael Jackson The Immortal last Saturday. I bought the tickets a year ago. Literally a year ago. I knew Diva would LOVE the show.
I didn't tell Diva until a few days before that we were going. She was very excited. We went and had dinner beforehand. When we arrived at the BOK Center Aunt Bets, Diva and I got in line for the bathroom. Diva was dancing around and squatting trying not to pee her pants. We had made our way pretty close to the front of the line with Diva dancing all the way. A woman walked by us on the way out of the bathroom. Aunt Bets and I saw her before Diva. We just gave each other an oh shit look. She was a little person. We could only imagine what Diva was going to have to say about this. Diva stopped mid dance and says (in her most quiet Diva voice) "Mom!! She was short but she looked like a grown up! Was she a grown up or kid?!" *Sigh* Diva doesn't have a quiet voice so I'm sure the entire BOK Center just heard this. I explain that she was a grown up and people come in all different sizes. She was satisfied with this answer.
We make our way into a stall. Despite Diva's insistence that she get to go in her own stall I make her go in with me. I don't care how big she thinks she is. She's 5 and there are a ton of people in this place. We do our business. Diva is talking to me non stop. All of a sudden~ again in her most quiet voice~ "Mom! You have on silly panties!" Oh-Em-Gee. I'm embarrassed. I can hear the ladies standing outside the stall laughing. We walk out. Wash our hands. Aunt Bets is standing there laughing. Everyone else in the restroom is laughing as well. I'm sure my face is the color of a tomato. Diva notices everyone laughing. She gets upset and starts crying. When I ask why she tells me she thinks they are all laughing at her. I explain that no one is laughing at her. They are all laughing at me because I was wearing silly panties. I just want to get to our seats. We make our way down to our seats and get settled in.
The show starts and Diva is enthralled! She keeps asking when Michael Jackson is going to sing. We had talked about this. I remind her we had talked about this. I explain again that Michael Jackson is dead. They are just going to play his songs tonight. "Oh right. I know." The show proceeds...there is a group of people sitting behind us. One of them says something about Lady Gaga. Diva catches this and shrieks "Is Lady Gaga going to be here?!?!?! I want to see her!!!" Ha! Yeah...sorry. No Lady Gaga. The performers bring out a tall pole and they start walking a beautiful woman out towards the pole. I dubbed her the "pole dancer." All of sudden Diva decides she has to pee. Right. Now. I take her to the potty again and miss the pole dancer. I am told she was the best performer of the whole show. Aunt Bets and Mr. Mayer really liked her. Thanks kid. While we were in the potty Diva had a lot of questions about whether Michael Jackson was in Heaven and how did he get there. I'm not sure what I said to the 'how did he get there' part but I did confirm he was in Heaven. We get back to our seats and settle in again. Mr. Mayer makes sure to tell me how good the pole dancer was. Just rub it in will ya?! There is a lull in the music. The arena is quiet. Diva announces~again in that really quiet voice she doesn't have~ that "They must be having a really great party in Heaven tonight. I'm going to wave to my Papa Walter, Uncle Walter and Michael Jackson. I bet they are hanging out." She then raises her arm and starts to wave with all her might. I hear a few chuckles behind me. I tell Diva that was very sweet and I'm sure they are having a great party.
Diva was loving the show....until 'Thriller' came on. Diva is the child who is terrified of anything in costume. You can imagine how tricky Halloween is. We can't eat in Chick Fil A because there is someone who roams around dressed like a cow. Sporting events are a game of hide and seek from the mascot that walks around to see all the kids. She's been getting better. Then 'Thriller' came one. There were people dressed like bats and zombies. Diva lost it. She sat in my lap and hid her face the entire song. I had a nice view of her hair. The rest of the evening she spent sitting in one of our laps. When the show ended we had one very tired little girl on our hands. She convinced her Daddy to carry her. Not a hard thing to do.