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Showing posts from 2017

Just Keep Swimming...

Somewhere around my third phone conversation with my insurance company today I hit my wall, hard. I'm not fit for human contact today. I have cried with my dog, I have cried in the lobby of my kids school, through doctors appointments, and in the car. I will probably cry again before I go to bed tonight. My coping mechanisms are crying and chocolate. We are currently out of chocolate. This weekend was epically bad. #1 and went to a cheer competition in Dallas, Texas for the weekend. We were just there last month, staying in the same hotel. Saturday was day one of the competition and a long day. We left our hotel early and came back around 8:30. We were exhausted and showers and bed were needed. #1 and I were both in bed asleep by 9:30. Around 11:40 a cheer mom calls my cell phone and asks me to come down to the lobby. I get a sweatshirt and pants on and start making my way downstairs before I even thought about it. It was an automatic response. Halfway down I decided to look at my

#MeToo

The news over the last week has been hard to ignore. A powerful man has been dominating the headlines for his misconduct against women. Over the past day the words "me too" have been trending. The actress, Alyssa Milano, tweeted out yesterday encouraging people to post "me too" if they have been a victim of sexual harassment and assault in an effort to shine a light on how prevalent it is in our society.  I'm going to jump on this bandwagon and say #MeToo. In 2004 I was 23 and working for CPS in a small county about 30 minutes from where I lived. This particular day I had a court hearing. I had recommended the parental rights of one of my clients be terminated. I was sitting in the judge's chambers with the District Attorney, my client's attorney, the Assistant District Attorney and the children's attorney. We were all discussing what led to my decision and the ADA and children's attorney were explaining why they supported my recommendation. I

Adulting is Hard

It's no secret that being an adult is hard. Being a parent is really hard, especially with the bombardment of social media and other outlets. Everyone has an opinion of what you should or should not be doing, saying, eating, etc. It's exhausting when you have average "normal" by society standards children. Throw in a little boy who is viewed as a little different and things get 10x harder. A few weeks ago my favorite musician, P!nk , accepted the Video Vanguard Award at the MTV Video Music awards. Her speech that evening struck a cord with me. At the time I could not place my finger on why it affected me so much, but this morning something happened, and I understood. I have made no secret that #3 is different than other kids. He is loving, affectionate, empathetic, and will stand up for anyone he thinks has been wronged. He loves Minecraft, his laser guns, Five Nights at Freddy's, and the color blue. He also loves Queen Elsa, having his fingernails painted

Reaching Goals and Defeating the Inner Voice

Guess what happened today?! I completed something I started two years ago!!! I know. I know. Two years seems like a long time. Especially when I started and stopped a million times. But, 9 weeks ago I set a goal for myself, and today I completed it. I completed a Couch to 5K program, and I am proud of myself for the accomplishment. I have started and stopped this program a dozen times, always around week five or six. I had a million excuses not to finish it. To some this may seem like a pretty minor accomplishment. I know lots of people who could do a 5K in their sleep. However, me, I have never been a runner. I have never considered myself an athlete. Finishing this today felt really great. Growing up I was never encouraged to participate in sports or extracurricular activities. In fact, I was almost discouraged from participating. If I would say I wanted to try something, like running track, I was told  "You can't do that. You aren't a runner." I wanted to

Who Says Romance is Dead?

While Mr. Mayer was running errands a little while ago he text me.... Mr. Mayer: That's a 15". Me: Oh no! 13" it is!         Yes. I like that much better.          Wait....That's the 13"? What is the size under that?  Mr. Mayer: 12" Me: I like the 12".  Mr. Mayer: Really?  Me: Hold on for a second.  Mr. Mayer: The 13" is quite a bit heavier. Don't know if that matters or not.   Me: Is the 12" deep? Cause the one I have that I use the most is 12", but not very deep.  Mr. Mayer: 12" is on the left. These are deeper, and steeper sides too.  Me: Yes--I like the 12". It's a good size.  Mr. Mayer: Okay. I might get the 15" later to use.  We were discussing skillets people!!! Skillets!! Mr. Mayer knows how to woo a girl. He bought me a composter last week. 

Taking Back Summer

I am a professional at over scheduling and doing too much. I have really been working on this and trying to simplify my life a little. I have been focusing on meaningful relationships and moments, and taking more of a quality over quantity approach to life lately. It has been hard, but has been so worth it. Summer has been a perfect test to my efforts. Last summer I worked and when I wasn't working I had a "fun activity" scheduled. We were so scheduled and busy that we lost the "fun" part somewhere along the way. Mr. Mayer and I took a long weekend together last summer and I was so tired from our "easy summer" that I just wanted to sleep the whole time. That's not fun. This summer we have played with our neighbors and cousins, swam and slept in. The kids get to pick two camps they can do. The boys had one in June and another one in July. #1 didn't want to do any camps other than her cheer camps she has to do, and I am not making her. We have

We Are Done!!

Whoo Hoo!!!! We have finished our renovation--mostly. We are still going to steam and re-stain the grout on our tile, but that will wait until sometime in the fall. The big renovation is D O N E. I am so relieved, and worn out. Our renovation turned into a much bigger job than I expected. Getting new floors put in is very similar to moving. Everything was packed and stored in the garage. There was a week we slept on mattresses in the floor. The kids loved that part of the process, and thought we were camping. Our dogs also loved it since they could get closer to us. Initially the install was supposed to take a week. If you read my earlier post , you would know that the install was delayed almost two months before they started. We had everything packed and waited what felt like forever. By the end of the first week of installation it became clear that enough flooring and trim had not been ordered. They were not going to be able to finish the job and had to order more. Grrr....this fru

Renovations

Last year Mr. Mayer and I had a pool and patio built, as well as landscaping to the front and back yard. It took nine months, and by the end of the process I was d-o-n-e and over it. Oh! We had the outside of the house painted as well. However, everyday we are so happy we had it done and love our backyard and pool more and more. Well, that was easy, why not another project?! Sure! Really, this newest project has been in the works for close to three years. We started talking about it and looking at flooring samples and changing our minds a million times over the years. We wanted to do it, but didn't know what kind of floor we wanted. All we knew is that the carpet was gross and had to go. Throw in three small children and three dogs, one being diabetic and no control over his bladder, and the carpet had definitely seen better days. Flooring was pushed back due to the new pool, and we still didn't know what we wanted. Finally in March of this year we had decided what we wante

Just a Boy and His Sandwich

My children have hated sandwiches since birth. I used to really let it bother me that they refused to eat sandwiches of any type, but over the years I adjusted and did not give it a second thought. When school started last August the Dudes got to start eating in the cafeteria. It is regular conversation for me to ask everyone what they ate for lunch that day when I pick them up. Imagine my surprise when #3 starts telling me daily that he ate "brown bag." Brown bag is a SANDWICH, chips, pickle and usually a fruit. A sandwich. Everyday. #3 was eating a sandwich at school every day, but still refusing to eat them at home. Fast forward to Monday of this week. I am waiting in my usual spot after school and watching the Dudes run up the sidewalk towards me. #3 was walking slow and eating something. What? As he got closer I could see he was strolling up the sidewalk eating a sandwich. No joke. #3 climbs in the suburban and I ask him what he is eating. He gives me a big grin and say

Friday Morning Coffee

The ladies and I met at 918 Coffee this morning at 2446 E. 11th Street in Tulsa. I have missed the last few weeks because of a yucky stomach bug that has been circling around our house. The other's have had coffee at 918 Coffee for the two previous weeks. I asked if we could go one more time so that I could try it out too. They were very willing to go again. 918 Coffee is not a large coffee shop. It is comfortable with tables and chairs scattered throughout. There are two conversational areas with couches and chairs set up in separate corners. It was busy for a Friday morning, with a variety of people in the shop. Some looked like students, others looked like they were professionals there working, and there were several groups of people who looked like they were having a Friday morning coffee like we were. 918 Coffee has an extensive list of coffees and flavors. They also have non coffee options such as teas and hot chocolate, and they serve alcoholic beverages. The food is a va

Friday Coffee....

A couple of months ago I started having Friday morning coffee dates with some of my cousins who live in town. I jokingly call it our Tulsa coffee tour because we have been hitting up a new coffee shop each week. After we all drop our kids off at school for the day we meet up for coffee. Life is so busy for everyone and we have a tendency to get stuck in our routines and not stay in touch. We live in the same city and we can go months without seeing each other. Our Friday morning dates give us an opportunity to see each other, catch up, laugh and stay connected--no kids, no pressures, just time to be. Some weeks we can sit all morning, other mornings we are only able to carve out an hour, but it is always time well spent. This morning we met at Foolish Things Coffee Company located at 1001 S. Main Street in Tulsa. I have lived in Tulsa for thirteen years and have never been here. It is near the Tulsa Community College downtown campus and was busy for 9am. It is an open area with lots