We are going to be late.

Ever done something that hurts, is hard, and you want to quit, but when you are done it feels so good??? That's how this week has gone for me. This week on my fitness tour brought me to Revved Fitness.   And it hurt so good. Revved is almost identical to Orangetheory. They do a combination of cardio and strength. You wear a heart rate monitor and the goal is to to elevate your heart rate and work in certain zones. The only difference I noticed is that Revved uses stationary bikes for cardio and Orangetheory uses treadmills. Revved offers a 7 day trial for $10. I signed up online and went to my first class Monday morning. Monday morning came and was stormy, early, and a line was almost out the door when I arrived. Yikes! I signed in and wandered into the room. It was a BIG class. All the bikes were full, and there were people on rowers and the strength area. The trainer split us in half. Half the class started with strength the other half started with cardio. I got in the...

Hey! Hey! Hey! My fitness tour is still going strong :) I am pretty confident I will be able to at least make it to vacation time doing free, or discounted classes around town. Then I can make my final decision on what I want to stick with. The last two weeks have taught me that my fitness level has gone way down....I am not as strong as I thought I was. Maybe gone down isn't the right word. Maybe, more like, I'm nuts and had a skewed perception of my fitness level....maybe I was never as fit as I thought I was??? All these classes are giving me a dose of reality. This week I started off strong with CycleBar . Now. I LOVE spin classes. My friend, Jeff, started teaching spin a million years ago, and I took my first spin class with him in 2011. He has always been my favorite instructor and I compare every other class to him. Every one. So, on a scale of 1-Jeff how did I like Cycle Bar...I'll admit, it was at an 8 or 9. Maybe if the instructor and I were friends outside of cl...

HEY Y'ALL!!!! It's me again!! hahahahaha....life has a way of zipping by, doesn't it? Life has been going by at warp speed around here. I'm still working. I only regret it twice a week :( I would by lying if I said I didn't miss being at home. I miss the day to day stuff, and I hate paying a babysitter. It breaks my heart when one of the kids tell me they miss me, or they wish I didn't work. However, the extra income is nice. Seeing Mr. Mayer not as stressed about finances is nice, and I feel like I am contributing. My main reason for getting a job remains. I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder.  Considering my genetic makeup if that's all that I have, I'm okay with it. I was medicated for a long time. I stopped taking my medications two years ago and have been able to keep a handle on myself for a long time. However, I had a bad month in December. Besides the normal Christmas stress, my wheels were stolen , which added anoth...

When I left you guys I had just taken a new part time job! Happy to say that is going well. I started the week of Spring Break, so that was not the best timing, but it worked out. Then the kids were in school for a week and our Oklahoma teachers walked out. Thankfully #1 cheers at a gym that is full of teenage girls willing to babysit. I won't lie. There have been some growing pains, and I still haven't figured out how to keep up with my laundry. There are days I work well past 2pm and the kids beat me home from school. Every highway in TTown is under construction and getting downtown to work by 8am is nearly impossible. I think it is understood by my new employers that I will be perpetually late for eternity because they are never going to finish the construction. But, overall I like my new job. I like being around grown ups, and the extra $$$ is a nice perk. Spring time in the Mayer house is notoriously a busy busy time for us. We have millions of end of the school year thin...

Things are changing y'all.... About six weeks ago I applied for a part time therapist job, on a whim. A month went by and I had not heard anything about the job, I assumed it wasn't going to happen and carried on with life. Then I got a phone call asking me to come in for an interview! Over the course of the month between applying for the job and the interview I had talked myself out of wanting to do it. Cause, that's what I do. I went into the interview thinking it would just be good practice and I had zero intentions of pursuing the position.  Last year I applied for a job I really wanted. It was somewhere I had always wanted to work and was so excited about the prospect. I was told that the job was mine, then I was emailed and told that a former employee had emailed and said she might be moving back to Tulsa and they were going to give the position to her. I was devastated. Then a few weeks later I was emailed again offering me the job again. Needless to say I decline...

This guy, #2. Out of all my kids this one is the most like me. He's easy going, talkative, happy to be here and a total hot mess. Because he is so chill, and other than the occasional trip to the ER for stitches, he doesn't have many other needs or demands. Lately his brother and sister have been getting all my undivided attention. Between seizures, cheer and the flu my focus has been on them. #2 has just carried on without any complaints. He's rarely sick and was a little miffed that the other two had the flu and got to stay home with me on school days. So, I let him play hooky a couple of weeks ago. Normally I am very strict about them going to school and not missing. But, the other two have got to spend a lot of one on one time with me lately for illnesses, cheer, birthdays and doctors appointments, so I decided that #2 could have a day.  He was so excited when the day arrived. His brother and sister were not nearly as excited as he was! We had no plans other than h...

It's Valentine's Day once again...some people love it, other's hate it, or there are those of us that are more neutral to the holiday. I fall into the neutral column. I can't get over the inflated prices, and the flood of hearts, candy and stuffed animals everywhere. It's a little much for me. I also don't understand why you need a special day to declare your love, I'm more of a show it every day kinda gal. Oh well, just my two cents. My kids L O V E it, so I celebrate a little bit for them. I always get them a small gift, some candy and a card. This year was small stuffed pillow things, some chocolates and silly cards. I have sent them flowers in the past, but that doesn't happen very much. #2 thinks it's weird to get flowers from his mom. The kids all have their school parties today and carted bags of valentines to give to their friends and teachers. We've been so busy that I put the kids valentine's together for them yesterday. We used...

Dear Older Girl, You, the older teenage girl...you see that little ten year old girl over there? Yeah, she's a loud, moody, silly preteen girl. She's gangly, and doesn't know what to do with all the big emotions she's starting to feel. This is the time she needs you. She's not as baby cute as she was when she was four or five. It is easier to overlook her now, but please don't. She's watching you. She's wanted to be you for longer than you probably know. Try to remember six or seven years ago when you were her age. Remember how excited you felt when the older girls paid attention to you? That's where she is right now. She's stuck somewhere between a child and a teenager, in her own little purgatory. She's discovering her likes and dislikes, and getting more freedoms in the world, which can be a little scary. She needs a role model, and you're who she is watching. I'm not asking you to be her best friend, big sister, or spend every...

We've have the flu in our house recently. Yuck. One thing that always remains consistent is that having sick kids is the worst. I have never felt more helpless as I do when my kids are sick. They don't feel good, they are cranky, there isn't much you can do for them, and anything you had hoped to accomplish for the day has gone out the window. You spend your day snuggled up, or fighting a cranky alligator. There is no in between. When your kids are little a lot of times they are unable to tell you what doesn't feel good. They cannot tell you their head hurts, their tummy hurts, or their throat hurts. They cry, whine and drive you to the brink of insanity before you figure out they are running a 102 degree temperature. Then when you discover they are sick there aren't many medications you can give them. If they are old enough you can give them Tylenol and Ibuprofen for their fever. You can go to the doctor and get a prescription if appropriate. But, if they are suff...

We have an Uncle Ryan. He's really a cousin, but all my kids call him Uncle Ryan, and it fits. He's fun, gregarious and the kids L O V E him. But #2 really loves his Uncle Ryan. Even before Uncle Ryan and Aunt Elizabeth moved to Oklahoma, #2's first question anytime there was a family get together was "Is Uncle Ryan going to be there?" Uncle Ryan speaks #2 extremely well. He builds robots and boats with #2, and they have long discussions about how the world works, and I am sure that one day they will solve some major world problem. #2 takes everything Uncle Ryan tells him as  true and absolute. #2 is also a concrete thinker, so sometimes this is problematic. Recently Uncle Ryan casually told #2 that if he blotted his pizza with his napkin it would soak up the extra grease. We went out for pizza one night recently. This restaurant had cloth napkins, which is a novelty to my feral children, by my own failure. Our pizza arrived and I gave everyone a slice. We all ...

I am a habitual over-doer. I have always been that way. In years of observation I have learned I come from a family of over-doers. It used to drive me insane that my mother was never able to just sit down and chill out with the rest of the family, until I looked in the mirror one day and realized I was the exact same way. I was driving myself, and Mr. Mayer, to the brink of insanity. Last year I made a resolution to myself to do less. I was worn out, my anxiety was out of control and I didn't feel like any aspect of my life was getting the attention it deserved because I was stretched thin. It was difficult at first because I was used to having an over scheduled life that if I had free time I felt like I was missing something. The first part of the year started by me saying no to requests for parties at my house and not scheduling "get together's" or "fun activities" every weekend. The kids rebelled at first. I had created little monsters that thought we sh...

Somewhere around my third phone conversation with my insurance company today I hit my wall, hard. I'm not fit for human contact today. I have cried with my dog, I have cried in the lobby of my kids school, through doctors appointments, and in the car. I will probably cry again before I go to bed tonight. My coping mechanisms are crying and chocolate. We are currently out of chocolate. This weekend was epically bad. #1 and went to a cheer competition in Dallas, Texas for the weekend. We were just there last month, staying in the same hotel. Saturday was day one of the competition and a long day. We left our hotel early and came back around 8:30. We were exhausted and showers and bed were needed. #1 and I were both in bed asleep by 9:30. Around 11:40 a cheer mom calls my cell phone and asks me to come down to the lobby. I get a sweatshirt and pants on and start making my way downstairs before I even thought about it. It was an automatic response. Halfway down I decided to look at my...

The news over the last week has been hard to ignore. A powerful man has been dominating the headlines for his misconduct against women. Over the past day the words "me too" have been trending. The actress, Alyssa Milano, tweeted out yesterday encouraging people to post "me too" if they have been a victim of sexual harassment and assault in an effort to shine a light on how prevalent it is in our society.  I'm going to jump on this bandwagon and say #MeToo. In 2004 I was 23 and working for CPS in a small county about 30 minutes from where I lived. This particular day I had a court hearing. I had recommended the parental rights of one of my clients be terminated. I was sitting in the judge's chambers with the District Attorney, my client's attorney, the Assistant District Attorney and the children's attorney. We were all discussing what led to my decision and the ADA and children's attorney were explaining why they supported my recommendation. I...

It's no secret that being an adult is hard. Being a parent is really hard, especially with the bombardment of social media and other outlets. Everyone has an opinion of what you should or should not be doing, saying, eating, etc. It's exhausting when you have average "normal" by society standards children. Throw in a little boy who is viewed as a little different and things get 10x harder. A few weeks ago my favorite musician, P!nk , accepted the Video Vanguard Award at the MTV Video Music awards. Her speech that evening struck a cord with me. At the time I could not place my finger on why it affected me so much, but this morning something happened, and I understood. I have made no secret that #3 is different than other kids. He is loving, affectionate, empathetic, and will stand up for anyone he thinks has been wronged. He loves Minecraft, his laser guns, Five Nights at Freddy's, and the color blue. He also loves Queen Elsa, having his fingernails painted...

Guess what happened today?! I completed something I started two years ago!!! I know. I know. Two years seems like a long time. Especially when I started and stopped a million times. But, 9 weeks ago I set a goal for myself, and today I completed it. I completed a Couch to 5K program, and I am proud of myself for the accomplishment. I have started and stopped this program a dozen times, always around week five or six. I had a million excuses not to finish it. To some this may seem like a pretty minor accomplishment. I know lots of people who could do a 5K in their sleep. However, me, I have never been a runner. I have never considered myself an athlete. Finishing this today felt really great. Growing up I was never encouraged to participate in sports or extracurricular activities. In fact, I was almost discouraged from participating. If I would say I wanted to try something, like running track, I was told  "You can't do that. You aren't a runner." I wanted to ...

While Mr. Mayer was running errands a little while ago he text me.... Mr. Mayer: That's a 15". Me: Oh no! 13" it is!         Yes. I like that much better.          Wait....That's the 13"? What is the size under that?  Mr. Mayer: 12" Me: I like the 12".  Mr. Mayer: Really?  Me: Hold on for a second.  Mr. Mayer: The 13" is quite a bit heavier. Don't know if that matters or not.   Me: Is the 12" deep? Cause the one I have that I use the most is 12", but not very deep.  Mr. Mayer: 12" is on the left. These are deeper, and steeper sides too.  Me: Yes--I like the 12". It's a good size.  Mr. Mayer: Okay. I might get the 15" later to use.  We were discussing skillets people!!! Skillets!! Mr. Mayer knows how to woo a girl. He bought me a composter last week. 

I am a professional at over scheduling and doing too much. I have really been working on this and trying to simplify my life a little. I have been focusing on meaningful relationships and moments, and taking more of a quality over quantity approach to life lately. It has been hard, but has been so worth it. Summer has been a perfect test to my efforts. Last summer I worked and when I wasn't working I had a "fun activity" scheduled. We were so scheduled and busy that we lost the "fun" part somewhere along the way. Mr. Mayer and I took a long weekend together last summer and I was so tired from our "easy summer" that I just wanted to sleep the whole time. That's not fun. This summer we have played with our neighbors and cousins, swam and slept in. The kids get to pick two camps they can do. The boys had one in June and another one in July. #1 didn't want to do any camps other than her cheer camps she has to do, and I am not making her. We have ...

Whoo Hoo!!!! We have finished our renovation--mostly. We are still going to steam and re-stain the grout on our tile, but that will wait until sometime in the fall. The big renovation is D O N E. I am so relieved, and worn out. Our renovation turned into a much bigger job than I expected. Getting new floors put in is very similar to moving. Everything was packed and stored in the garage. There was a week we slept on mattresses in the floor. The kids loved that part of the process, and thought we were camping. Our dogs also loved it since they could get closer to us. Initially the install was supposed to take a week. If you read my earlier post , you would know that the install was delayed almost two months before they started. We had everything packed and waited what felt like forever. By the end of the first week of installation it became clear that enough flooring and trim had not been ordered. They were not going to be able to finish the job and had to order more. Grrr....this fru...

Last year Mr. Mayer and I had a pool and patio built, as well as landscaping to the front and back yard. It took nine months, and by the end of the process I was d-o-n-e and over it. Oh! We had the outside of the house painted as well. However, everyday we are so happy we had it done and love our backyard and pool more and more. Well, that was easy, why not another project?! Sure! Really, this newest project has been in the works for close to three years. We started talking about it and looking at flooring samples and changing our minds a million times over the years. We wanted to do it, but didn't know what kind of floor we wanted. All we knew is that the carpet was gross and had to go. Throw in three small children and three dogs, one being diabetic and no control over his bladder, and the carpet had definitely seen better days. Flooring was pushed back due to the new pool, and we still didn't know what we wanted. Finally in March of this year we had decided what we wante...